Hi friends. I’m in need of some help. Thank you very much in advance.
For context, I’m currently running Rahu Pratyantar dasa. She’s in the 8th in Leo, no cusp. My Sun is in the 12th conjunct Pluto.
Ever since I started Rahu’s PD, I’ve been having newfound panic attacks. Never really had them before, and it’s getting worse. I’ve always had a fear around losing control of my mind and cognitive function.
2 months ago, I had a session with my somatic coach. We start off the call by me opening up to her about how life has been. After I began, I got a panic attack that I could not get out of. After 20+ minutes of trying to regulate, I had to end the call and do it on my own. I always feared “losing control” around another person, too.
Today, I was going about my work at a cafe, same thing I do every day, and then all of a sudden I get a panic attack out of no where. Head started getting dizzy, warmth in body, heart racing, arm tingling, sweaty and cold hands.
It’s important to add that I typically drink two cappuccinos and intake 6-9mg worth of nicotine pouches almost daily. Maybe I’m more sensitive during Rahu PD and should cut it out?
Any advice on how to overcome this fear? Can anyone relate?
Stop these sessions where you dig in the trauma. It's not for now.
A friend of a friend is terribly under panic attacks, since many years. It's incredible how far it can go. She somehow manages to keep living and taking care of her 2 children, but so limiting, she cannot even eat in any restaurant, drink from the cup at a friend's home... Of course she cannot to take any medicine. Almost anything can trigger the panic attack. Anyway, that kind of therapies which go into the trauma have been always very bad for her. She has tried very many things.
And coffee is not helping your nervous system. Without it your nervous system can better start to come back towards a regulation.
Move your body, exercise, run, swim, whatever, long time, get tired. It will also help you going towards self-regulation. (I guess you are young)
Feel the company of God or imagine being supported, embraced, imagine it very physically, by something powerful friendly, loving, it makes something in the neurons, and focus on keeping calm despite whatever, sometimes you'll succeed. And cherishing any tiny little improvement, at a certain point it will pass, everything passes, as an old friend used to say in a funny suburbial comedy way.
Whatever feels good, spend time with it.
No idea about what Rahu in 8th could be doing.
You are at the beginning, good, take care, hope you sleep enough.
All the best.
@marianela Hi Marianela! Thank you dearly for this advice.
I cut out caffeine and nicotine for almost 4 days now. My body does feel more regulated. My heart feels at home when it beats, calmly and peacefully. I've been taking cold plunges these last few days to reset my system and to help with my caffeine withdrawals, works like a charm.
RE Feeling the company of God -- I agree. I don't do this enough, yet it does wonders. I think it's easy to think that "my body is turning against me, therefore God is turning against me" but that is not so. Someone below said to turn the fears into friends and that they are there to liberate.
Marianela gave very good advice that I completely agree with. All stimulants are going to increase the frequency and intensity of panic attacks. Best thing to do is wean off the stimulants in order to bring the nervous system back into a state of homeostasis and balance if quitting cold turkey is too difficult.
Being in the fear of “losing control” denotes suppressed or ignored emotions over a long period of time coming to the surface in a forceful way. Trying to control it will cause more friction between the mind and the emotions, making it worse as time passes.
After a long period of time, it becomes difficult for the mind to separate the different emotions present in this sudden rise of feeling, causing it to not be able to deal with it properly and reading it as a “loss of control”.
I have learnt to deal with my own surges of chaotic emotions and the rare panic attacks. It works for me and the emotions and panic attacks around that particular reason or incident subsides, leaving me feeling back in control. The same feelings do arise again, but in different contexts at different points in time, and I find that slowly I have started to depend on this process to regulate the body system.
The first point is to recognise when the panic attack happened or happens - what was the thought that was coming into consciousness or what was happening or what you were about to do or planning to do when everything went haywire. In this case, when you were conversing with your coach, there would have been a subconscious thought or the remembrance of a subconscious incident that brought up the storm, making the mind unable to cope with it and hence resulting in a panic attack. Same thing when you were at work.
If you can remember what it was about, you will have to work with your thoughts, memories, interpretations, etc. to be able to neutralise it. That will take time and work depending on how old you are. If you can’t remember the reason for it, the best thing might be to remember the feeling of the panic attack, and then when you are safe at home or with a trusted person who is present physically, you can remember how the panic attack felt and allow it freedom in a controlled environment. So, basically you are reliving the panic attack but now you have control over it, not the other way round. Slowly, the emotions will dissipate and the mind will understand the feelings behind it all and start feeling in control again, enough to be able to sort out the root of the problem.
Unfortunately, none of this is easy and will need a lot of courage and a true need to break through. Best to find a good counsellor, preferably who is present physically, who deals in mind-body connection, or if you want to do it yourself, read up on it first and understand it, so that when you experience it, you will ‘get’ what is happening and be able to direct things properly.
Going cold turkey with regards to the coffee and nicotine patches at this time will cause more stress to the system that is already dealing with other problems.
@manisha Hey Manisha! Thanks so much for taking the time to write this great advice.
I've started to analyze the situation around the attacks -- the environment, what I was thinking, drinking, etc. I've connected some dots.
1+ hours before the attack, I drank a cappuccino. A few minutes or so before, I put a nicotine pouch under my lip for like 30 seconds. My period was a few days away, and I was in quite the irritated mood naturally. So it seems like it was partially triggered by the stimulants and hormones. Maybe there are other triggers I'm not yet aware of I'll keep observing and analyzing...
Thank you again!
Looks like you are on top of things. A reminder just in case you missed it, Pluto will be transiting your Ketu for the next number of years, if I have understood your Rahu position correctly. Take care.
@manisha Yes, thank you for thinking of that! I also have a tight Ketu-Mars conjunction.
Perhaps lots of changes related to 2nd house things. Self-worth, resources, those closest to me.
Ketu is actually closest to my 1st cusp. So in general, I think Pluto will also transform my self-esteem, path in life, and who I am, helping me to change things that are not serving me.
Mars should give me a whole lot of energy to do this. Thought he likely won't come without his negatives :).
So how about in the middle, not quit cold turkey as it might be too stressful for the body to take, but cut down 50% usage of coffee and nicotine patches?
tuyet
@tuyetv I sometimes have all or nothing tendencies, so I quit nicotine cold turkey 3 days ago. I gave myself a few days to decrease my caffeine intake and today is my first day without caffeine.
Nicotine withdrawals gave me irritability, but that seems to be gone now. Caffeine withdrawals gave me headaches, but a cold plunge seems to solve that 🙂
@curioussoul Hi, thank you for sharing your personal experiences! I am reminded that many, many years ago, I also struggled with panic attacks. They were closely connected to the functioning of my heart. I became very sensitive to even the smallest irregularity in my heartbeat, and whenever it was out of sync, the panic attack would begin – of course, I would feel very strong palpitations. A few times, I called emergency services, and each time during the conversation, I calmed down again. It's very interesting to look back and see what was happening then. I married a man I wasn’t happy with, and he had no understanding of my mental struggles – the attacks got worse because of that. They disappeared as suddenly as they appeared with my pregnancy, and they never came back, which I find very surprising. I believe that my protective instinct for the child was so strong that it distracted me from my own physical sensitivity. Hormones must have played a role too. I have Rahu in Scorpio with my 8th cusp. Over the years, I have learned to trust that my heart is strong. Stimulants, by the way, also played a big role as triggers. But there is definitely a deeper cause as well. I have found that it is an absolutely existential fear of dying. Rationality doesn’t help much with that. Today, I see it more relaxed because I know that the right moment to die will simply come, and when it does, so be it. But what was absolutely important was learning and recognizing that I am strong and have a strong body.